Dear Olivia and Bently,

Real Life. That is what I am living. Well I guess that's what we're all living. :) When I imagined growing up, getting married, having children, I expected the fairy tale. Adoring husband, perfectly behaved children, white picket fence, of course I would be a stay at home mom, and the house would be spotless and smell of chocolate chip cookies. This is not my reality. My reality right now, today, is as follows. Husband is sick, throwing up every hour or so. Livvy is teething and is crying and wanting to be held almost constantly. Also not napping. Bently is adorable and is such a trooper for taking the back seat. The house is a mess. Seriously. Dishes are stacked everywhere, the family room floor needs to be vaccumed, badly. The bathroom is starting to look like a public bathroom (eww), and the list could go on and on. The kia needs an oil change, but we're out of money for this pay period. I am trying to clean and cook and take care of 2 crying kids (yes one of those is daddy! ;) Plus working full time. I am currently living off of 4 hours of broken sleep and it's making me extra emotional! I sat here at work thinking of all the things I had to do and feeling very overwhelmed. I suffer with comparing my life to others. I want that picture perfect life I dreamed about as a child. I want to be home all the time with my babies, I want to buy a house and fill it to the brim with memories. As I sat, wallowing in self pity, I realized, this is real life. No one, NO ONE, has the perfect life. All lives are filled with trials and sorrows. I guess what I am trying to say, is when you grow up, get married, have babies, don't be surprised if it's not exactly how you pictured it. If you don't have the nicest furniture, or a full set of matching dishes, or a house. Don't feel overwhelmed when the dishes pile up in the sink and the children are screaming and you make waffles for dinner because frankly, you barley had time to do that. Because I learned today, I need to enjoy these moments. The moments when my kids are little, where I am a 911 dispatcher and have the opportunity, every single day to help someone. The time where your Dad gets to be home, to share in special memories with you. There is so much beauty in my life. Bently and Olivia, you guys are a big majority of that beauty. You and your Dad. You guys are my happiness, my happily ever after. You make every single day amazing. I have so much to be grateful for and I truly feel like I am living my fairy tale. Sure it has it's downs and twist and turns, but how boring would your story be if it was perfect? I guess this long rambling letter is just to tell you, life isn't always perfect. It hardly ever turns out how you plan, and that is ok. Because you can do hard things. You can overcome and move on, and become a better person because of what you've been through. Trust in the Lord and his plan and his timing and all will be okay in the end. I promise.


I love you both so much. Thank you for your smiles and endless hugs and kisses. I can't get enough of my adorable babies!


Love,
Your very tired and rambling Mom.

Dear Olivia,

Yesterday we were walking around Target when your naughty brother dropped something he shouldn't have been playing with and exclaimed, "uh oh!" Without missing a beat you copied him with your own cute little "uh oh". It may have been the most adorable thing I have ever heard in my entire life! The rest of Target we all took turns getting you to say "uh oh"! It was seriously too cute for words!

Love,
Mom

Dear Olivia,

We celebrated your very first Easter today! You missed the egg dying yesterday due to your napping through it. This morning we did the egg hunt and you were really too little to find eggs so you mostly played on the floor while Bently hunted. You loved chewing on the plastic eggs though! You looked so cute holding them in your hands gnawing away! ;) Speaking of which, I think your first tooth might finally be coming it! :) It's getting so close! I can actually feel the bump now! But back to Easter, you got a toy for your first Easter! You love it, and unfortunately so does your brother! He is constantly taking it away from you poor girl. We're still working on the sharing thing! ;)


You are getting so much closer to crawling on all fours. You can actually crawl on all fours, but you only do it for a short while before you drop to your tummy and army crawl. I always get excited when I see you crawling on all fours! It makes me realize how soon the day will come when you'll be walking! Your Dad and I were actually talking about it today! We both can't imagine it right now but I know it'll come soon enough! You are only 3 months away from being one which is completely crazy to me! Time has gone by too fast! You are so big! Where the heck did my baby go? To be honest I am excited as much as I am sad that you are growing up! I'm excited for summer where hopefully both you and Bently will be running around like crazy people. I have been secretly propping you up to standing so that you can gain the leg muscles required to walk. Bently walked at like 13-14 months and I really want you to walk sooner! Don't tell your Dad! He's dreading having 2 walkers! ;)


You have gotten so giggly lately! Seriously you laugh all the time and I love it! I cannot get enough of your adorable giggle!


Love,
Mom

Dear Olivia,

This is something I kept telling myself to write about and I kept forgetting. So here I am months later writing about it. Well technically it's still happening but whatever. So from probably about a month old and on you have been a gassy baby. Now that's not unusual for a baby but what was unusual I how badly your stunk! I mean they were doozies! Every single one of them! It was a little bit embarrassing. I mean, we can say it was you, but people just assume we're lying! ;) It's still a problem but the stink has definitely gone down.


I love you my stinky little girl! ;)

Love,
Mom

Dear Olivia,

You have been so close to standing. I kept waiting and waiting for you to do it! Well you finally did it! You were just sitting there in the bathtub and you pulled yourself up! To say I was proud was an understatement. I was ecstatic! My little girl is getting so big! Now walking is just around the corner! Okay not really because you haven't done it since. But you did it once so I'm counting on it! I only had my phone so the pictures are blurry and sorry our naked. I didn't tell you to stand up for the first time in the bathtub! ;) Love you Livvy!

Love,

Mom

 

 

Dear Olivia,

I have SO much to catch up on. Let me start with I believe it was Saturday night the 5th. You were fussy all night long. You just weren't sleeping very well. You had a runny nose and I think you had swallowed a lot of the mucus into your stomach. As I was patting your back and you suddenly threw up all over my shoulder. It smelled like adult throw up. You didn't get any on you so I quietly laid you down and threw my shirt on the floor as quickly as possible. Later that same night I was nursing you in bed when you threw up a TON of breast milk all over the bed. Now I was extremely lazy and exhausted at this point. I decided instead of making Greg get up and change the sheets I would just put a towel over it. (It didn't smell)


The next night I got into bed, found a towel in my way, threw it on the floor and went to sleep. You screamed and cried and fussed. It was a long and awful night. About half way through I remembered what the towel had been on the bed for but once again I was just plain too tired to care and I kept on trying to sleep. After being away from 5 am to 8 am I decided to get up. We weren't getting any sleep anyways. As I was walking you around I noticed you would tense up and push then cry. It finally dawned on me you were probably constipated since you hadn't pooped recently. I called up Aunt Shawna, who is a constipation expert, and asked what to do. She informed me to stick a bulb syringe up your little bum and squeeze warm water up there to help loosen things up. I laid you down and got to work. You didn't seem to mind it too much but nothing was happening. I kept putting more and more water in there. Finally I decided to do it one more time. Well as I pushed the water in you decided to push. Thus causing me to get sprayed from my chin to my stomach in butt water. I was so exhausted there was only one thing to do, laugh. I laughed and laughed. It was pretty hilarious.


I then realized I needed a shower and you probably did too. So I scooped you up and took you in the bath with me. As I was filling it up I happened to glance back at you and see you surrounded by poopy water. You pooped! That was the good news. The bad news was now I had to get rid of the poop. Most of it went down the drain but there was some chunks that couldn't fit. We were out of toilet paper so I couldn't just scoop it up and dump it. So I grabbed the closest bath toy and began to smash that poop down the drain. It took a good bit of time but finally all the poop was gone!


It was quite an eventful couple of days to say the least! I love you silly girl!


Love,
Mom

Dear Olivia,

For the past couple days your Dad and I keep catching your crawling on all fours. You only do it for about 10 seconds before you lay flat on your tummy and army crawl again, but I think you're getting close! Then twice today you tried to stand up while holding on to something. I wouldn't be surprised if you started doing both those things within the next couple days! It's so exciting to watch you grow and change! You'll be walking before we know it! Ahh!

Love,
Mom

Dear Olivia Beth,

We went to the zoo for Bently's birthday! I was so excited to go with my kiddos! I LOVE the zoo! :) You had been to the zoo before when you were a little tiny baby! I hate to admit but I was so excited to watch Bently at the zoo I forgot that you notice things around you now! You loved it! You watched all the animals with the cutest look of wonder on your face! It was the cutest thing I have ever seen! The best part is when we went to the giraffes. You were just watching them and smiling and clapping and doing the cutest little noises! You were just star struck by those giraffes! :) I love you beautiful girl! You are my most favorite daughter! :)

Love,
Mom